All of these choices are looming up ahead of me and I’ve been eyeing them from a distance, trying to figure out my stance in each scenario. I feel like people around me have followed pretty little patterns for life and stayed on the same basic path with each piece fitting together like a giant life puzzle, but in my life the puzzle pieces are tiny and at first glance they don’t even look like they belong in the same picture.
A big part of what God has been teaching me this summer/fall is about being poor and being wise and being diligent to what I know to be right. I have a collection of sea shells and rocks that I have to try to sneak past customs and they all have verses sharpied on them so I can remember each theme that I dealt with during this trip.
The decisions coming up are about my future, what is the best step for right now and what is the best direction to start heading? What is worth investing more time in and what should I give up? A big part of this is seeing which doors God opens, but it also is important for me to have a clear vision for what I would like to do. It is hard to look back and see that my life has taken so many random turns, by this time many people my age have their graduate degree and are moving into a field that they are actually expert in, but my life didn’t go like that. I have dabbled in administration and graphic design, I have had some real experience in banking and in some of the aspects of ministry but apparently not enough to get more than an entry level type job, and my real interests lie in ministry, management, worship and discipleship. So you’d think logically that I want to be a worship leader, right? I sorta do… but finding the right church, or really any church is a problem. Finding a job as a worship leader that will pay more than the bank does is a real problem. The small ones can’t pay and the big ones want better than me.
I don’t know, guys. So now that you are all stuck with me in the quandary and we have no solutions.. let me thank you for your likes and views and comments, because you have no idea how encouraging it is to me that people actually take the time to read about my weird life. If you can be in prayer with me about my future and that God will maneuver me to where he wants me to go, I would be grateful.
Stumbling after Jesus together…