I’m still sitting on that nest of eggs but they aren’t quite hatched yet.
That isn’t what I’m writing to say.
There is this passage of scripture that has been defining my life this year and yet eluding me at the same time, it is in Matthew 6 where Jesus is saying that you don’t need to worry about your life because God will take care of you. He then says the famous words, “But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness and all these things will be added unto you.” I see that and my heart responds, I want to seek God first and not have such a burning desire for the things that will be added unto me, but it doesn’t really change my life. My ingrained responses are to desire and fight for and lust after the things.
The two areas that I struggle with the most frequently are physical fitness and spiritual fitness. I have great intentions that never happen, great moments that never end up happening again, and a great shadow of disappointment and disgust with myself that never quite goes away. I started reading this devotional called “Made to Crave” that links the similarities between being healthy both physically and spiritually, and today the devotion really hit me hard.
The story is of the rich man who isn’t willing to give up his riches to follow Christ. When he walks away, Jesus turns to his disciples and says that it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven, but then he says that with God all things are possible. We usually hear that phrase in other context, like.. “you might think you will never be successful, but with God all things are possible!” or some other such thing, but what he was saying right then was not that all success and glory is possible, but that all sacrifice and self-control is possible. All heart wrenching pain to follow Christ is possible, all denying of the self is possible, all daily making the choice to obey and squash the flesh is possible. Not that God can fly you to the highest heights, (which sure, he can.) but that God can pull you through the darkest depths. That is the promise he is making here, and that is the promise that I desperately need.
I’m finding that with my tiny wimpy efforts, God is revealing his heart and his blessing to me. When I try to seek him first that he really is adding things, but that the things aren’t what I’m the most excited about. (Thank goodness!) Maybe I’m actually growing in to the image and likeness of Christ.