this ring.

Have you ever been scrolling down your Pinterest feed and all of a sudden all you are looking at is engagement rings?  Some girl pinned dozens of rings trying to pick out the one that she wants from her future husband, all in her pin board of her future wedding, bridesmaid dresses and wedding gowns.  Girls these days obsess over this type of junk.

Before I was engaged, I had the exact ring that I wanted picked out.  It was handmade by a seller on Etsy, amazingly unique and beautiful, totally inexpensive.. absolutely perfect.  But when Jason contacted the seller, they were booked for months in advance.  Instead, he went to the store and painstakingly picked out a ring for me.

For awhile, I was still thinking that eventually we could get my dream ring.  But as the months have passed, this simple little band has grown to represent, not my idealistic dream engagement ring, but a symbol of Jason’s love for me.  It isn’t supposed to be MY ring, it is supposed to be HIS ring on my finger.  HIS claim of my hand in marriage.  HIS symbol of a commitment for the rest of his life.  In the wedding ceremony we give rings to each other as a token of our love.  So really, a ring that I picked out myself would be less appropriate because this is HIS token.

I think that I learn this same lesson with every gift that I get, it is less about if the gift is what I would have picked, and more about appreciating and treasuring the giver.  Gifts are a physical reminder of love.  Maybe I say this because I believe one of my strongest love languages is gifts.  There is a part of my heart that is just warmed to the core when someone takes the time to choose something for me or do something that they know would mean a lot to me.  If you show up at my house with toilet paper or diapers, it does the same thing as if you showed up with candy and roses.  It is less about the gift and more about the giver taking the time to give it.

So, my pretty little marriage ring.  (We never got a separate wedding band, so I just have one.)  It isn’t what I would have picked out of a jewelry case, but it reminds me of my husband.  I recognize his taste for modern angles and simplicity, I see his thoughtfulness that it wouldn’t stick out and catch on anything, I appreciate his choice of simple elegance.  My wedding ring is not a symbol of my girlhood fantasies, but of my husband’s love.  And that is exactly what it is meant to be.

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